Three Musketeers-four if you count D'Artagnan

I thought I'd take a minute of time to comment on something with a less critical eye and name something for which I am truly grateful-friendships. Male friendships in particular. More specifically I want to tell you about three friends who recently showed me love and support in a very real way.

These three friends made the drive to rural West Virginia to attend my dad's visitation. It was roughly six hours for two of them (Marshall Lively and David Frazier. It was a two hour drive for the third Joel Trinidad a.k.a. J.D.). While they are not my only close friends-their gesture of love during this time of need was to me an amazing gift of love and care. I've been friends with Dave and Marshall for right at 30 years and Joel for 18 years. Joel was the one who labeled us as the Musketeers.

The masterpiece by Dumas described three men who served as guards among the royalty of France (Athos, Porthos, and Aramis) as well as a fourth swordsman (D'Artagnan). They were swashbucklers and womanizers and carousers. My three friends and I have lived lives that when we were younger were glimpses of such adventures (in our own minds at least). The closeness of the four of us though is analogous to the group in the classic tale.

Guy friendships are often thwarted by egos, insecurity, and homophobia. The classic machismo of yesteryear shows itself still-but a subtle shift has taken place and now allows men to show affection and be open about feelings with one another. This of course isn't true across the entire gender-but the evolution thankfully has affected some.

Me being closer to forty than thirty certainly has something to do with a willingness to say "I love you" to male friends without having to add the word "man" at the end. I think we often feel like we have to qualify the statement and to make it more acceptable-like the Bud Light Commercials from a few years ago "I love you man"-or the excellent movie by the same title that was in theaters several months ago I Love You Man.

These guys are people I feel at home sharing that I love them though and for that I thank God. It is a blessing to have that sort of connection with people. These guys are not related by blood but are related by love, time, and humor among other things.

They became the presence of the Living Christ for me-not to say that they can't be jerks (like all of us can)-but their actions spoke the message God wants to remind us of continually "You are NOT alone. I am with you." They surrounded me with their love-and continue to do so. God can and does feed our spirits and helps heal them through the people we love and live with-and that is the power of the Holy Spirit at work. The Holy Spirit lives in relationships-working to redeem the imperfections and giving us strength when we feel as though we are broken and beaten. The Holy Spirit helps us too when we feel as though we're so frustrated that we want to break and beat the person with whom we're in relationship. No matter the case-God is at work in and around and through all of our relationships.

I got a good look at God's love last week in my long time friends coming to stand with me as I wept. For that I will be forever thankful.

So to David, Marshall, and Joel and all my friends who read this-I love you.......................................

man.

=-)
Dwight